Posts Tagged ‘exam’

hey survivor!

Posted: February 27, 2011 in story over coffee
Tags: , ,

This is exam season, it’s my logical reason for my absent in writing. Well, to be the truth, there is nothing really going on here, despite that I passed my exam with maximum mark :p. Others are just the same, the parties that I intentionally  missed, the cold lonely nights with coffee, music and books. The walk and the talk,  I still do. The coming and going of guys who keep trying and I keep refusing (of course). And the heart, my heart to be precised. She’s being very cooperative lately, maybe because I was torturing my brain more in balancing of my broken hearted, but whatever it is, I found them (both heart and brain) are survived. Or maybe I am simply a survivor that I barely known. And friends, ah surely they are the reason why I still be able to stand on my two skinny feet.

Time surely flies, it was just yesterday we celebrated the new year’s eve, and also it’s still in the back of my head how I was so down, I could not even think how I through those moments, but look at me now, it’s my smile decorate my face not the red lipstick.  Even in one day I woke up in the morning and searched my heart and asking to my self, “hei where are you? where is the heart which once broken down into pieces, are you still beating?” It’s not that I miss it, no, I just wonder how exactly the heart works, but then I knew, the broken hearted grows, because you have friends, who hold your hands, and the talks over coffee, over tea, over youtube, over soccer game, even over nothing, the walks in the 4 degrees temperature, the swing around huggies when your friend know you passed the exam, the simple greetings of good morning at 4 in the afternoon, the super silly jokes, the very late dinner, the purr of the cats, the everything that makes the wounded heart slowly stitched closed.

In the end, I know my heart will take me to another love when I am totally ready. I know right now I am being too careful, though all my friends encourage me to fall again, with or without parachute is another story. But surely, there will be a right time to fall and to be landed (to the right place). Because I believe everything will come at the right time, like now it’s not coincident that my radio playing the song with this lyric:


hey survivor
Don’t matter who you are
time ran so far away and you must save your life
(we know you can do it now….)

Hey survivor
you’re gonna fly away
to the places you’ve been
many times with a friend

hey survivor,
don’t you be afraid

hey survivor,
we’re gonna fly away, there will be another day

hey survivor
you will fall in love again,

I don’t even know who’s singing this song, but don’t you think those are very right words to describe about what I am and I feel now? Can I just call my self a survivor? because I feel so.